Hello frenz, I am ready again with a new topic. The topic this time is Shaadi or in more simpler words barbadi. Today, I am gonna discuss on the relationship between a husband and a wife. But before moving ahead, I want to ask a question from you all. Can you tell me "Why do we all marry??." Any answer??? No?? The answer is pretty simple. To experience the horror, terror, suspense, irony, stupidity & tragedy of life.
Shadi aisa laddoo hota hai jo khaye pachtaye aur jo na khaye pachtaye. Shadi ke bahut saare faayde hote hain, lemme discuss some of them:
1. Subah subah garam pani milega (bartan dhone ke liye)
2. Pyare pyare bachhe milenge (aapko ghoda banane ke liye)
3. Har roz aapki biwi aapse pyar se bolegi (ration lane ke liye)
4. Aap gana gana shuru kar denge (bachhon ko sulane ke liye)
5. Wo roz tayyar hokar saamne aayegi (shopping par jane ke liye)
Ab to aap samajh hi gaye honge ki mera target kiske taraf hai. Yeah, you got it right. I am talking about wife jisse shadi ke baad saare powers mil jate hain aur husband bechara chup chap kone mein pada rahta hai [:p]. If you'll expand the word WIFE, you can get the true nature of these deadly devil. Wife means Without Information, Fighting Everytime[:d]. Wife ko urdu mein begum bolte hain kyonki shadi ke baad saare gum husband ke hisse mein aa jate hain aur wife begum ho jati hai. Ab wife ke baare mein aur kya kahne, unko samajhna kisi bhi husband ke bas ki baat nahin. Wo shadi ke baad 10-15 saal tak tok tok kar aapki saari aadatein badal deti hain aur uske baad khud kahti hain ki " Aap pahle jaise nahin rahe".
Do you know why every girl needs a husband?? because there are number of things that go wrong and for everything you can't blame the government. Husband bechara kare bhi to kya kare, saare ilzaam badi masoomiyat se apne sar le leta hai[:d]. Ek maa hoti hai jo aapko rote hue is duniya mein laati hai aur ek biwi hoti hai jo is baat ka khayal rakhti hai ki aap saari umar rote rahein[:d].
Man before Marriage is like Airtel - “Aisi Azaadi Aur Kahaan”
Man after Marriage is Like Hutch - “Whereever You Go, Our Network Follows.”
Shadi se pahle dulha ghode par sawar hota hai. Aapko pata hai kyon?? Usse akhri chance diya jata hai bhagne ke liye. Lekin wo aage life milne wale 3rd degree se anjaan, khushi khushi sawar hokar dulhan ke yahan chala jata hai. Lekin shadi ke baad jab wo usee ghode ko dhoondta hai tab tak bahut late ho chuka hota hai kyonki tab tak uske khud ghode banne ka time aa chuka hota hai (apne bachhon ke liye).
Shadi ke baad husband ka naam bhi har saal change hota rahta hai:
1st year - Janu
2nd year - O jee
3rd year - Sunte ho
4th year - O pappu ke papa
5th year - Kahan mar gaye
6th year - Tum aate ho ki main aaoon
Husband apni biwi ke saare zulm hansi khushi jhelta hai aur aisa pretend karta hai jaise kuch hua hi nahin. Upar wale ne bahut bada dil diya hai husband logon ko [:d]. Shadi ke baad apni biwi ke har tedhe medhe sawal ka jawab deta hai. Waise biwiyon ke sawal bhi kam khatarnaak nahin hote. Unke sawal mein agar ek option phansi hota hai to doosra option umar qaid. Sabse common question jo abhi tak main TV serials aur movies mein sunta aaya hoon wo hai " Aapko mujhme mein kaun se cheez zyada pasand hai? Meri khoobsoorti ya meri akalmandi? " Koi husband khoobsoorti choose karta hai to koi akalmandi. Dono case mein usko biwi ka gussa jhelna padta hai. Agar mujhse bhi ye sawal kiya jayega to main kahoonga ki mujhe to tumhari ye mazak karne ki aadat sabse zyada pasand hai[:d].
Sunday ko ek special edition aata hai "Classifieds", jisme rishte hi rishte bhare hote hain thok (wholesale) ke bhaw mein. Aap agar gaur se dekhiyega to aapko usme ek se ek case milenge, jinhe padhkar aapko hansi bhi aa sakti hai. Ek baar maine dekha ki 80 saal ke aadmi ne rishte ke liye advertisement diya hai. Ab usse kaun samjhaye ki is umar mein rishte nahin , farishtey aate hain [:d].
I love collecting jokes and shayari. I have got a couple of husband wife jokes in my collection. Let me share them with you.
Ek baar ek husband ne apne wife ko thappar maara jispar wife naraaz ho gayee. Husband ne apne naraaz wife se bola " Aadmi usee ko maarta hai jisse pyaar karta hai". Phir wife apne husband ko 2 thappar maarkar kahti hai "Aap kya samajhte hain, main aapse pyaar nahin kerti?"[:d]
Ek baar husband wife mein ladai ho gaya. Husband ghar se chala gaya. Raat ko apni wife ko phone karke poochta hai ki " Khane mein kya hai?". Wife kahti hai "Zahar". Ispar husband kahta hai " Main ghar late se aaoonga, tum khakar so jana"[:p].
After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. Zindagi mushkil ho ya asaan, husband aur wife naam ke do pahiyon par aage badhti chali jati hai. Agar aap abhi bhi shadi karna chahte hain to shadi ke baad milne wali 3rd degree ka training lena abhi se hi shuru kar dijiye [:d].
I want to end today's talk with the following words : "You can fall in love with the personality(men) or beauty(women) of anyone. But remember finally you have to live with the character and not the personality or beauty."
Thursday, December 25, 2008
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tel me one thing imraan
ReplyDeleteu hv written dis seriously or in a humorous way???
abhi to mazak mazak mein likha hai... lekin ho sakta hai ki shaadi ke baad serious lagne lage [:d]...
ReplyDeletetum shaadi bhi karogey Imran?? ;)
ReplyDeletebhabhi ka naam to batao :P
well tumhare jokes padh k bahut hansi aayi....aur ye wala.. "mujhe to tumhari majak karne ki aadat bahut pasand hai "... :D :D :D to kaafi accha tha
aise likha karo :)
keeep it up :P
aur ye laddooo kab kha rhe ho :D :D
mere se mat poochna....mere ko bahut tym hai :P
mein tym aane pe kha loonga....filal to aapne liye laddo dhoondh rha hoo :D
chlo tc: )
nd badhiya likha :)
aise hi likho
All that I cn say,Woman n Man complement each other :)n even greater truth is a Man CANNOT do without a Woman :)n jokes were pretty gud,hope to see more of them.....
ReplyDelete@ akhil
ReplyDeletehaan mere ko bhi laddoo taste karna hai...pachtana to dono hi haal mein hai, to laddoo khakar kyon na pachtaoon [:p]
itne jaldi bhabhi ka naam bhool gaye?? [:o] sapna aur khushi yaad hai ki phirse yaad dilana padega [:p]
waise jokes hote hi hain hansi aane ke liye [:d]
ghabrao mat, dono saath mein hi laddoo khayenge [:d]... kaho to main dhoond doon tumhare liye laddoo [:p]...
thanks for the compliment [:)]... u take care too [:)]...saturday ko milta hoon tumse, haarne ke liye tayyar rahna [:d]
@ moumi
ReplyDeletemain kuch nahin boloonga [:o]... kuch kahoonga to aap kahengi ki bahut bolte ho [:p]... yup, those were my fav. jokes... thinking of creating a new blog on deadly jokes...[:)]
bhai kia dukh bhari raam kahani suna dii..apny ap ko kafi tiyar rakha hai..fir ap na sahdi kerna or na phusnaaa..lolz[:p]
ReplyDeleteor wesy bi pehly lerki tu mil jai..[:P]
but i tell u one thing...life meets us one time..so y we make our life hell with the person u love.....we should make our life bright with the person we love and only thing that can work is to understand..is to show ur character in positive way..jus give up all the things..that create problems....y don we try to live happy and share our rest of ife with small moments of happiness..if as wife,,girls make mistake they should accept it..they should understand their husband and respect their family as thir own..like his mother on her own mother...she doesnt creat differences.....i beliv life would always be great with positive thoughts...with he person we love is life..not a burden..i dont know about others..but i beliv on myself..how to make my life happy without the use of all the cheap wordss...like apapu k aba..n zahar stuff..[:p][:)]
aysha, ye dukh bhari kahani kahan se lagi tumko?? [:o] maine to comedy script likha tha, ye tragedy kab ban gaya? [:d]
ReplyDeletewaise tum kaafi experienced maloom padti ho[:p]... well, i cant say anything right now, jab waqt aayega to kahoonga [:)]
v.ggod
ReplyDeletekafi acha likha hai
bt thora sa appnay MUBALGAY say bhi kam lia
orr shadi k laddo ko ager na kha k bhi pachtana hai to phir kha k q na pachtaya jaya
atleast dil mai sakoon to hooga k khalia
hasrat nahi rahi koi
wase wife itni buri bhi nahi hooti
haan ye baat to tumne sahi kaha .... agar pachtana hi hai to laddoo se pet bhar kar pachtaya jaye [:p]....
ReplyDeletewo to shadi ke baad hi maloom chalega ki wife kitni buri hoti hai [:d].... abhi tak to serial aur movies mein sirf husband par zulm karte hue hi dikhayee padti rahi hai [:p]....
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